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We have heard the expression that love conquers all. It is somehow a mystery that gives life and healing, binds souls together and whispers that all will be well in everyday life. Even in the Holy Book, we can see how love conquered fear, evil and sins. Love is so aptly used to disarm a lot of challenging issues in marriages, relationships, family disputes, siblings, communities and otherwise.
The power of love is enormous. Love enraptures and spreads all through the heart and body, empowering, comforting. It is when we lose ourselves in its embrace that we discover why it is said that love conquers all. We therefore find a lover behind love and that lover is committed to conquering all that is not love and all that is not lovely. With the rate negativity is rapidly gaining ground, one wonders if love still conquers all. There have been cases where there was stiff opposition to the proposed union of young people, but eventually love prevailed and conquered such opposition, resulting in successful marriage ceremonies and new relationships between families that were previously strangers to each other.
Again, there have been instances where the parents of a girl refused to give out their daughter in marriage to a young man they felt did not meet up their desired standard, and therefore not considered worthy based on his family background. But when love opened the eyes of the inner man of the parents, the initial refusal gave way and the youngsters got joined in matrimony.
Take the case of 18-year-old Adolphus Wilkky, who lived with his uncle as a teenager. The uncle was the horticulturist to the Israeli site engineer of a major Nigerian-owned construction company. Wilkky’s uncle, the site engineer and the managing director the company all lived in the private residential estate of the company. Then what was initially a platonic relationship developed between Wikky and Peace, the 16-year-old daughter of the managing director. But somewhere along the line, an innocent relationship morphed into a romantic one and before you could say ‘Jack Robinson’ they had become sexually intimate leading to Peace getting pregnant, a fact that became apparent after three months.
The unfortunate development was a most disturbing outcome that left everyone on both sides shocked. As turned out, Wilkky never denied responsibility for the pregnancy. With deed already done, his uncle summoned his parents, who came from the village. Both families came together and agreed peacefully that it was the most traumatizing period for them. They agreed that abolition was out of the question. Then also agreed that the teenagers needed support to overcome the challenge posed by teenage pregnancy. Of course, the managing director, given his status, was embarrassed by his daughter, who had heavy burden of having child at tender age, when their mates were preparing to further their education.
Despite the emotional pain caused by the unplanned pregnancy, the two families chose to allow love reign and guide them in the unpleasant situation. They held unto love as a unifying factor, resulting in their taking steps to harmoniously support their children. Together they planned a wedding for the teenagers. On his part, the father of Peace rented a furnished flat for the youngest ever couple to live in. They got a car. It was also agreed that delivery of the child, the mother of Wilkky would take of the baby, to allow the young parents to return to school immediately.
Wilkky eventually graduated and was employed the same construction company. Then after 25 years of diligent service to the company, he was appointed the managing director while Peace became a chartered accountant and was employed by a top accounting firm. Their story was a pure case of love being allowed to conquer and rule. Love overcame all the fears and negativity that ordinarily would have poured out in a situation of unwanted teenage pregnancy. The beautiful outcome was a win-win for all.
It is significant to recognise and accept that love when rightly applied can overcome most situations. The truth is that love is about the mindset and inner thought which result in what we see as the emotional behaviour, attitude and character. A no-no stubborn attitude to work, offer, opportunity and agreement is not a result-oriented lifestyle conquered by love.
But on the flip side is the story of a 78-year-old man who vehemently refused to let love rule and he hacked down his 84-year-old elder brother with a sharp cutlass, because of a dispute over the boundary of a piece of land. The two senior citizens simply refused to let love conquer, over the land issue. The tussle defied the intervention of kinsmen. One wondered why such elderly men would allow a disagreement degenerate to point of one pulling a sharp cutlass to kill his own elder brother. People in the community booed the 78-year-old when he was arraigned in court for killing his brother. They blamed him for such grievous display of intolerance and stone-heartedness.
That a man and a woman would agree to love themselves, walk down the aisle and procreate, and then within years of the exchange of vows, unimaginable heartbreaking stories begin to emanate. All because people never wanted to allow love to conquer all.
Two great friends, Timothy Abaego and Michael Onwe, both dealers in building materials business, which flourished tremendously in their days. Both had served their master diligently and he rewarded them accordingly. They became like brothers, known among their peers. Now, they had contributed equal amounts and jointly purchased a piece of land. They also contributed money equally and developed a two-story building which was meant for commercial use. The joint business yielded profits over a period of 15 years. With time, life and times started changing so fast for both families. First, Abaego died, then Onwe divorced his wife, got into polygamy as he married other wives. Somewhere along the line, it became necessary to share the joint asset, but people who did not know how the true history of the possession came into the matter and made it complex and the matter went to court for adjudication. Both the plaintiff and defendants were not the rightful owners/inheritors of the said property but greed blindfolded them as lawyers fed fat on them.
Now, four of the sons of a late legal luminary family are going through a similar court process because they did not let love conquer all. The four sons are fighting over who should be the face of their late father’s chamber. Lawyers are also feeding fat on them as the legal fireworks continue. Prominent Nigerians, including the close friends, relatives and in-laws of their late father have all intervened, sued for peace and allow love to conquer; it has not yielded any positive result till date.
Dear people of God, life is so short. It is to be lived and enjoyed in love. God created man in His own spiritual image. The Good Book says that “God is love.” Because he first showed love through the redemptive work of salvation in Christ Jesus, the Almighty expects us to manifest His love in all our undertakings and relationship with others. In one of his apostolic letters, Paul wrote an amazing and evergreen tribute extolling the supremacy of love: “Love bears and endures whatever wrongs or irritations that come between us. It also believes and hopes the best for others, seeing with the eyes of faith they could be in this sense, love truly conquers.”
