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Hurray! Christmas is four days away. The hardship in the country notwithstanding, Nigerians are still determined to celebrate the commemoration of the real essence of the Yuletide: the birth of the Redeemer of mankind from eternal condemnation.
There will be exchange of gifts, and people will various events ranging from traditional weddings, chieftaincy titles, thanksgiving celebration for various reasons, school reunions, to end of the year parties in offices and various places etc. There is no season that is as active as the Christmas season. It is a time of celebration at its peak. For what the season brings during this period, parents and guardian tend to limit their restrictions and punishment on their children and wards.
Christmas season comes with the mass exodus of people from the cities to rural communities, to spend the Yuletide with kith and kin. From overseas – United States, Europe and African countries, relations pour in. Even as air fares and inter-state bus fares have shot up, the increases have not stopped people from travelling, especially people from the Southeast. From January to November, they would work and save towards the season. While my father was alive, he made it compulsory for us to return during the yuletide for a family reunion. Rita, my cousin who lived in New Jersey, United States, used to tell us: “I keep three jobs in the US. Two take care of me in the US, while every dime from my third job was saved for my Christmas travel and expenses.”
At this time, reflection on how the year has gone should be uttermost in mind of everyone. Along with should be a focus on charitable giving during this period. So many families do not need to exchange gifts for Christmas, they need to exchange apologies. They need to wholeheartedly settle old disputes. Make peace, forgive each other, heal from the bruises of past years and repent from pure acts of wickedness. These would be true reflection of blessed Christmas for many.
In some marriages, spouses have a cat and dog relationship. Some live as flat mates. Out of anger, bitterness, acrimony and poor communication, the joy and love that blend with marital vibes seem to have taken a back seat. This season is the time to sheath the sword and think of the goodness of the Lord. Life is for the living. This is the time to reflect on how the marital journey started, the first words, the first date, first lunch and the first night as a couple. Forget the wrongdoings and flow back into a blessed loving union.
Two sisters became sworn enemies and have carried the backlog of their grievances for three decades. Trouble started when Joan’s daughter named Cherish was posted to Abuja for her one-year national youth service. Congratulations were in order from all corners of the family. Not hard of where she will stay because her mother’s younger sister, Aunty Mary lived in Abuja with her own family. So Cherish travelled to Abuja and was warmly received by her aunty and young family. As a young lady in town, Mary’s husband’s office was two buildings away from the secretariat where Cherish would do her documentation. Aunty Mary requested her husband, Thomas, to help and drop Cherish at the place. From then onwards it became normal for the two to go to work together and come back together. The man made the love move initially, but Cherish turned him down, but she never opened up to both her mother and aunt. The man changed his style and spoilt her silly, showered her with expensive gifts and the young lady fell into the trap, and she got into an affair with Thomas. A supposed ‘Uncle’ who should have protected the young in-law started an unholy relationship with her. Soon she got pregnant and all hell was let loose. Mary had no inkling of what was hovering over her head. In confusion and anger, she drove her little niece who she nursed as a baby. Uncle Tom gladly rented an apartment for her immediately, and she moved in. Just like that, Uncle Tom turned into a man married to two wives, two relatives. Mary cried out her heart. Cherish came for youth service but instead broke her home irretrievably. In the heat of the bitter quarrel, Mary accused her sister, Joan, of raising a poor girl broke her home. Joan accused her sister of marrying a dog-of-a-husband who destroyed her daughter and made her a single mother. The two sisters became sworn enemies for years. Despite pleas for reconciliation from different quarters (family, maternal relatives, including the Rev. Father) both refused to make up.
For sisters Joan and Mary, and other family members who have found themselves in different family squabbles alike, the Christmas season is the time to make true reconciliations. For the ungrateful beings of this world, this is the time to remember the good done to you and stop unnecessary bickering. Charles was a young lad who was about to be taken over by street delinquents. His father cried out for the senior step brothers to take him away from the village, which they did. His siblings took him and trained him till he graduated and got a job in a blue-chip company. But today, those senior step-brothers who trained him are his arch-enemies. They have been in Court in the last nine years over an old landed property left by their late father. Charles, this season is the season of repentance. Ask yourself: if you were not trained by your siblings, where would you have been today? When they were equipping you with education, which is the best legacy in life, were they doing it to end up in court with you? Reflect on this truth. In this season, you need repentance and reconciliation, not exchange of gifts.
Brothers who betray their brothers who live in foreign countries, this is the time to repent from wickedness. Innocent cried out his heart when he returned home from his base in Europe unannounced to see the shambles his brother Gregory raised in the name of building for him. He got so infuriated and summoned the kindred meeting immediately. He asked the council of the gathering… “Ask Gregory to bring his account details and see the amount of money I sent for this project. From my record, I have sent N38m with the architectural drawing of what I wanted, pointing at the building; this is what he is giving me.” Such wickedness need to be purged. Many do not know that our brothers and sisters who live in foreign countries find it difficult to cope. The reason they keep two to three jobs at a time to make ends meet.
There are a lot of issues that many people are going through in life different in families, work and business places and communities. The masters who refuse to settle their apprentices after years of serving them, madams whose stock in trade is to maltreat their domestic workers, cooks who poison their bosses; drivers who do not give accurate account to the vehicle owners, workers who pay less attention to the work and put in their best in their private areas; teachers who eat students’ food, all need to have a change of heart at this time of the year.
What about hospital workers who connive to sell babies and ritual killings which have almost become the order of the day for youths and various other crimes?
While basking in the euphoria of celebrations, please make the necessary amendments. Where you need to render sincere apology, please do it. Where forgiveness should strive, warm embrace is needed, settling old disputes, please do it for the season. We all need each other.
