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By Chukwuma Umeorah
Given the leadership role of men in the family and across several spheres of life, the need for concerted and deliberate efforts to celebrate men continues to resonate.
Many have also argued that the enormous weight of leadership requirements men have consistently delivered drains them physically, mentally and emotionally.
Therefore, as experts continue to provide improved ways for men to become better versions of themselves, world-class performance coach, Abiola Salami, harps on the importance of emotional intelligence in actualizing sound leadership as well as managing the emotional drain that accompanies the role.
It is in light of this that the visionary coach organized a special event for men, which brought together a team of experts in different fields with real-world experiences in celebration of the 2022 International Men’s Day, to share their knowledge with over 150 participants as they dissect the message of his book, “Magic of Emotional Intelligence” and its application in solving real-life challenges to become better leaders.
The event held in Lagos and featured a panel that discussed the power of emotional intelligence and the benefit of self-awareness in everyday life.
Salami said the role of leadership transcends holding positions of authority. He posited that every individual can be a leader, given that he has the responsibility to be of service and care for others.
He said: “As far as you have the opportunity to serve people, it is important to acquire the skill on emotional intelligence, which is one of the reasons of my book, to democratize emotional intelligence and make it available to more people around the world.”
Salami also called on those in government and positions of authority to apply the skill in improving their leadership and governance strategy as it would help to yield more positive results and improve the life of the citizenry. “It is about every leader knowing that what they learn, after they think they know, is what counts. This means that any leader that truly intends to better the society would need to pay attention to emotional intelligence because the better they understand the people they lead, the better leaders they become,” he explained.
The discussants included the head of marketing and communications of a bank, Babajide Sipe; a senior journalist, Mike Nkwocha; managing consultant at Translantic Development Ltd, Dr. Bankole Allibay; and acting chief executive officer of HCI Healthcare, Dr. Abdulkadiri Osumah.
Opening the discussion with a corroborative mindset that there is need to set aside more dates to celebrate men just like the female gender that has several recognized calendar dates to celebrate them, the panelists went steps further to discuss ways in which men can become better leaders in the society.
The take-home message from the panel was the mastery of one’s emotions which was described as the ability to perceive, manage and regulate emotions when dealing with situations. According to them, this may seem like a Herculean task, but it can be achieved with consistent and deliberate resolution.
They posited that the mastery of one’s mind and the intelligent application of this skill in our everyday life would help any individual surmount tremendous challenges and assist in making better and more productive decisions.
They also emphasized that the skill of emotional intelligence which was described as a life-hack can be applied in relating with other people, be it at the workplaces, the streets, relationships, places of worship among others.
Just when one would think that the lesson about mastering one’s emotions was enough take-home gift for one day, there came the icing on the cake of the panel discussion which was about importance of self-awareness.
The experts held the opinion that self-awareness, especially in tough or complex situations could be the line between a bad and a productive day. According to Bankole, “at every point in time, you must get consent from your common sense before you talk or react. You do not just act impulsively because a simple situation can become really complex with a bad decision.”
He said that self-awareness would help one make informed decisions. On his part, Sipe held the opinion that a lot of attention had been given to the women thereby neglecting the men.
He noted that men have feelings too and that even with the ego and masculinity that comes with their nature, there is need to come together to have deep conversations that would help to grow, develop and inspire them.
Relating it to the theme of the event, he said: “Every man relates with people in his everyday activities from family to workplaces and as a result of that, it is important that you are able to understand how to manage your emotions.”
He noted that no man is an island and it is imperative to understand how to manage and relate to other people’s expectations and experiences given that they come from different backgrounds and experiences. He advised that one should be understanding and treat people from a point of empathy.
Corroborating his thoughts, Nkwocha said: “Men cannot do it alone. There is a need for us to talk to each other, reflect on our responsibilities as to what nature and society bestowed on our shoulders and find ways to help each other.”
He noted that platforms like this would help to remind men of their roles to ensure that they become better in the society while gearing them towards the vision of what they need to achieve as men.
