Am I a true supporter?

This is the question of life. It is not for just me or any one person. It is the one generic question everyone must personalise and answer. It is probably one of the most adaptable, the most elastic and the most vexed questions that man would ever have to field.

Am I a true supporter? You can adjust or adapt it to suit your setting or you. For instance, one: in life, am I a true lover? Two: in business, am I a true partner? Three: in marriage, am I a true friend? Four: in the office, am I a true team player? And, now, the area that inspired this entry, five: in politics, am I a true loyalist? Please hold your thoughts just yet.

The true supporter is a friend and a confidant. The true supporter is an embodiment of mother-ish and fatherly natures. The true supporter is loving and patient. The true supporter is respectful and honourable -as well as ardent and loyal.

The true supporter is not an abuser nor a disgracer. The true supporter is not a judge nor a complainant. The true supporter is not a reporter nor a correcting fluid. The true supporter is not a deceiver nor a traitor -not a sycophant nor an eye servant.

With that background, let’s retrace to where we left it off. Am I a true supporter? Instead of rushing to answer that, better first look in the mirror. Who do you see: a true supporter or a mere transactionalist?

Transactionalists are not true supporters, and true supporters are not transactionalists. Transactionalists are fake business people who trade support in anticipation of reward or gain, while true supporters are selfless background chanters, drummers, encouragers, prayer warriors and singers who work to applaud or cheer the supportee all the way to victory and throughout. Now, the question that snowballs from the foregoing is one that you and I must answer. In my marriage, in my friendship, in my business, in my walk with God and in my politics, have I all along been a true supporter or a mere transactionalist?

To be sure, transactionalists are profit-conscious, profit-driven and profit-desperate. They don’t care about anybody or anything that doesn’t or won’t feed or promote their greed. They are easily angry, envious and pugnacious. They can in a nanosecond bring down the house which took them years to put up -all because of delay or denial.

Going by all I have experienced and seen and heard and read and known in the last nearly 52 years, my conclusion is that in totality there might only exist .0000000001% true supporters and all of 99.9999999999% transactionalists -globally. Husbands and wives who ought to be exemplary lifelong true supporters and protectors of each other are rather busy playing the journalist; finding fault and transmitting lies and shame in dirty righteousness. Friends who ought to defend their relationship with everything they have are instead tearing at each other over money or power or doubt or fear or suspicion. Business partners, who ought to stick together no matter the situation, don’t realise they have no business attempting to kill or bankrupt one or the other even when things go kaput.

I see pastors and brethren calling out pastors or other brethren over something they said or thought they said or did. That might be correct but it is not right because no true supporter should do that. It doesn’t matter how abominably guilty the accused are, their supporter or ally or colleague or follower or spouse who transmogrifies into an accuser was never a true supporter -in the first place. At best, such a one was only either a monitoring spirit or a human time bomb or a silent profiteer -or all.

The true supporter is one who supported and still supports sans nursing reasonable or unreasonable expectations. The true supporter is grateful even when passed over or shamed or mistreated; they are permanently grateful for the opportunity and the test. Persons who supported and continue to support are long-suffering, loyal believers. True supporters are transgenerational sure champions whose reward is here and there, in life and in death, on earth and in heaven. 

Flowing from all we have said hitherto, would you say that true supporters exist in this self-centric, deceitful, thankless world? That fair question had been answered above. For effect though, it bears reiterating that the world over, there might only be a handful of true supporters. In fact, in Nigeria especially, it is almost impossible to be a long-term supporter let alone true.

No thanks to ethnicity, materialism, politics, religion and watery values. Our country is wired in a way that two compatriots or a group cannot agree or support, for too long. Also, most supportees (especially politicians) tend to prefer opponents or non-supporters. It is nearly impossible to keep rooting for people interested in wooing only those they should pay scant attention while simultaneously ignoring those they should woo.

This piece is therefore to remind us to unlearn and relearn and mobitivate ourselves accordingly.

It is nearly impossible to be that true supporter but it is not impossible because Jesus -who we claim to love and follow- did it. We must strive every day to support people and continue supporting them, even in spite of them. Let nothing that supportees do deter or make the supporter regret or quit.

However, if true supporters should quit for whatever reason(s), they should do so like forever supporters; not like people who were just chilling in mischief: whiling away the time watching over their transactional plantation. If true supporters must quit, they must quit like friends who only need rest. True supporters ought never to quit like frenemies; you know, enemies who all along posed as friends. You are a true supporter if you quit noiselessly and without malice and thereafter remain amenable, grateful and happy (ever after).

This is an easy thing to do, once you are able to resist what I call egoistic pride. Learn to keep your mouth shut. Learn to never voice bitter reactions or vitriolic sentiments. Learn to not act, decide or talk, when angry because 10 over 10, you shall sooner than later feel small and stupid and sorry. 

Never forget that even the worst crimes are not as bad and unforgivable after some time. So, dear supporter, give supportee some time; don’t breathe down somebody’s neck just because you are their expectant supporter. Remember that nothing lasts forever; rest assured that tables shall soon turn in your favour, willy nilly. Your fears, your perceived doubts, or what your people and you suspect as the evil-for-good actions and inactions of supportee may sooner or later prove false.

So, be calming down: supporter, friend, partner, subordinate or follower. Give it time, and do so with joy. And, whatever happens, never forget that true supporters and company never grumble, never regret, never quit, never tell tales, and never do all such other nonsense. All of that is the way of the transactionalists, not of the true supporters.

Above all, never be anxious since God -Rewarder Numero Uno- is alive and never fails. With Him, no true supporter goes, nor shall ever go, unrewarded: never. Remember that, every time supportee does or says stuff strong enough to tempt you to quit. Finally, dear true supporter, because I am convinced you need it, receive strength to stand to the end and to stay true against all odds.

God bless Nigeria!

My 30th anniversary on air

From June 5, 1993, to June 5, 2023, is three decades. That’s how long this writer has been a broadcaster, yet. This serves to thank everyone who called, messaged, SMSed, visited or celebrated in their own way.

The planning committee with Rt. Hon. Itoro Columba (+234 802 354 7268) as chair and Prof. Nsikak Idiong (+234 816 660 6494) as secretary will this week meet with me ahead of reconvening vis-a-vis the ad hoc event scheduled for December. If you have ever encountered any of our programmes and loved it enough to want to do a publishable tribute, please use: [email protected].

To be sure, these have been 30 years of glory, absolute glory. No court case, no NBC trouble; nothing, nothing. Family, mentees, sponsors, fans and friends, rise with me to say thank you to God, my Father, et al.

There’s so much to be thankful for, all-round. There’s so much to celebrate, physically and virtually. And, there’s so much more.

The next 30 years and the next 30 promise to be even more and most glorious -in that order. Our media firm, BUSH HOUSE NIGERIA, shall continue to reinvent the wheel and bring you quality media meals. Welcome to the programme!