The Christian husband

If you want to know whether Uncle loves his wife or not, you will ask her when he is not around. You may also ask the children. They know whether daddy loves their mum or not. Some of the rebellious tendencies some children exhibit in adult age, can be traced to their protest on how their daddy treated their mum when they were young. Poor treatment of their mum can affect discipline in the home, even when the children are still young.

What are some traits of a Christian husband?

Corrects his wife in privacy: I never rebuke my wife before the children or before any person. I correct and rebuke at 2:00 a.m. My relation, Chinenye reported me to her dad one time that I was not cautioning my wife. She had never heard my voice, and assumed that I was weak.

He is a good son-in-law to her parents: How do you relate to the parents who gave you their daughter? Sometimes, she may be their only daughter or even child! How you regard them speaks loud of whether you love your wife or not. He must be the Christian son-in-law. As the children are born, he must also be the Christian father. I will deal with this another time.

In my father in-law’s family, the Onyekere’s family, I am seen more as a son than a son-in-law. My fellow son-in-law, Emeka Akoh, marrying number 5, while I marry number 2, will always tell me to join the Onyekere’s family during family meetings, ‘because you are one of them’. True to his word, you will recall our testimony a few years ago, how he bought us a car and enquired from me whose name it would bear. It is good to be a Christian son-in-law. One day, as I arrived home from work, I met the top members of my wife’s family in a meeting. ‘What is it about?’ I asked them. I was told that they wanted one of their daughters to do an MSc. ‘No,’ I said, ‘she will marry first’. They laughed and accepted my position – a son-in-law overruling! How you make your bed is how you will lie on it.

He is faithful to her: After acquiring six wives – 2Sam 3 – Uncle David went ahead to sleep with Bathsheba, the wife of one of his soldiers who was in war front, fighting for his head and crown. A Christian husband should not be involved in immorality.

The Test for moral integrity:

If you live in one room, can your wife comfortably go for a vigil, leaving you and Chi-chi, her NYSC sister at home? What was special about her? Abraham accepted his wife’s wild suggestion of sleeping with his housemaid. The consequences of his actions are still felt until today.

His dealing with his difficult wife: 

Some, though married, will not disclose to their spouses their landed property or the fact that they had children when they were singles. Some wives have no regard for their husbands. We read in the newspaper the other day, how a wife induced her husband to sex and then murdered him. This lady’s ugly character should not be a license why her husband should not love her.

A Christian husband must be persevering: We said that Jesus is our husband, as we are the husbands of our wives. Let us review Jesus encounter with His bride. It was a woman from Canaan – Matt. 15:22-28. She needed Jesus to heal her sick daughter. She did not disclose her identity. Who knows if her husband was a king or the President of her country? Contrast her conduct with Dan. 5:13 – Pride! This woman had every reason to leave in anger after all the humiliations, but she did not. She persisted.  Here is a lesson for wives when making demands from their husbands. Here is a lesson for husbands and wives, when praying for their needs.

The Challenge

It is not then all the time that God or your husband will respond immediately to your needs. ‘Is she really in need of this?’ God or your husband may be asking but this woman demonstrated extreme humility because of her need. She sacrificed her pride for her daughter to be healed and she got it! Christian wife, is that you? Do you persist like her before your husband? Christian husband, is that you? Do you persist before God for your family needs like her? I am talking about the man who shares the same position with the Lord Jesus, the husband of all believers; the man, who wants Jesus to marry him the same way he marries his wife; the fellow, who wants Jesus to be relating to him the same way he relates to his spouse, the man, who wants Jesus to be faithful to him as he is to his wife, the man, who will like the husbands of his daughters to be treating them as he treats their mother…

If your love for your spouse falls short of this, come out and kneel. If you don’t want Jesus to be treating you the way you treat your spouse, come out and kneel here. 

For further comment, Please contact: Osondu Anyalechi:  0909 041 9057; [email protected]