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The New Year means a fresh start and time for self-improvement. For some couples, it is a time for reflection on how far they have fared and focus on areas of improvement for the New Year.
Every relationship faces its ups and downs, as well as trials and tribulations. The key to making it through hard times is taking on challenges together and working toward the same end goal.
Successful relationships are founded on fundamentals like communication and respect, but are also bolstered by things like making time for special activities and nurturing each other’s individual growth.
Couples who are determined to keep the flame burning all the way through 2020 shared their New Year Resolutions with Heart Congress.
Beatrice: I have resolved to celebrate what makes my relationship unique
This year, I will not compare my marriage with what I see on Instagram or Facebook feed. I have resolved to hold my marriage to my own standard. Relationships move at different paces and ebb and flow in different ways. You can’t expect happiness by striving after an ideal set by someone else.
I have decided to be candid with my spouse about what I expect from our relationship and what I need to be my very best with him. We have been married for eight years now and wish to continue to be happy.
I see the challenges we have faced this year as obstacles we need to overcome to make our love stronger. I have resolved to celebrate what makes my marriage unique and enduring.
Richard: My wife and I have decided to work more as a team this year
With the economic situation in the country, it is almost impossible for couples to be on the same page. The pressure takes a toll on marriages and couples end up working in different directions instead of working as a team.
Many times, we forget that we are a team. We are supposed to take on the world together and the obstacles are ours to help fight and our achievements are ours to celebrate.
I have resolved that my wife of four years and I will stand by each other in hard times, and when our conflict is with each other, we will be open, honest, and work through it together.
We both have the same end goal to be happy with one another and make the other happy, so we will work as a team to remember this as we take on life’s challenges this year.
Ijeoma: We are starting a new business together
A new year is a chance to try new things. Sharing the experience with someone, especially someone you love makes it that much better.
This year, my husband and I will set up a new business to support the income from our jobs which is barely enough. It will be like discovering a new possibility as a team. It will also serve as bonding time for us. We are simply exploring something both of us can enjoy together.
Francis: My plan is to show more interest in my partner’s work
I have been with my girlfriend for two years now and she is everything I want in a woman. She knows I love and support her, but sometimes, I forget to show it.
As we deal with our own personal drama, we don’t always make out time to check in on our loved one and see how they are doing. She complained a lot last year about how I seem aloof to her own issues and it broke my heart.
So in 2020, I will go beyond the simple “how was work today?” and get to talking about the deeper stuff. I hope that by showing interest in her passion, she will feel supported and not abandoned.
I have realized that when I care about what she is dealing with, she will realize that I can be counted on in tough times and that I will always have her back like she has mine.
Jane: Our New Year Resolution is to laugh more
This year, my husband and I have decided to make laughing together a priority in our lives. We will go beyond our normal conversations to share funny stories that happened to us during the day and share entertaining memes found online.
This country is hard for us and we won’t compound our problems by being angry and mean to each other. We will go out to comedy shows together. We will also stream stand-up comedy sessions on our laptops and cozy up for a night of laughter from the comfort of our bed.
Essien: We will devote more time to sex
Life is not easy for married couples with children. Even as we find ourselves falling into a routine, we have planned to always make time for sex this year.
Our sex life suffered last year because of the many challenges we faced financially. We forgot to be intimate on many occasions and it created tension between us all the time.
If it doesn’t occur as naturally as it used to, we will let it happen spontaneously first thing in the morning. This year, I won’t let outside stresses or worries interfere with our sex life. We will keep it interesting. We will try new things, and create comfort with lots of sex and intimacy.
Gloria: Hanging out with other couples is top on our agenda
This year, my husband and I have decided to set out time to go on double dates and triple dates with other couples. We have been married for over ten years and it seems we are experiencing a rut.
I think that if we relate more with other couples, we will learn more about each other. This is because interacting with other couples will make us divulge our silly struggles.
We can also learn from them on how to spice things up because it will make us realize that everyone goes through hard times, and that they can be overcome.
Emmanuel: My girlfriend and I will be wary of social media influence
Couples who are honest with each other will know that social media can be treacherous territory when it comes to relationships. Suspicion, jealousy, and too much information can be the downfall if social media usage isn’t curbed and conducted appropriately.
Overtime, I have discovered that couples who have unhealthy relationships are engrossed with social media glamour. I have resolved to spending less time on my phones and more time interacting face to face with my girlfriend. We have been together for four years and I don’t want to cause any more problems between us this year.
Chizor: We will create date nights next year
I have been hearing of couples setting time aside to go out on date nights, but my husband and I have never tried it and we have been married for six years. Once a week, we have resolved to set aside a special night to enjoy each other. This could mean going out to a new restaurant we both want to try, or staying in for a home cooked dinner by scented candlelight. We will reserve a special time for the two of us and improve our relationship.
Edwin: I will tell my wife I love her often
My wife has been an unhappy woman. She says that I don’t love her anymore, but it’s not true. I just don’t know how to be romantic and affectionate like she wants me to. She doesn’t tell me she loves me anymore, she doesn’t talk to me like before. She keeps to herself. I have been trying to explain to her that I love her in my own way but she doesn’t want to hear it. But I have decided to change. I have resolved to tell her I love her as many times as I can this year. I hope it will return the spark we have lost in our relationship.
