Are you like Alex Ekubo?

The tears have not dried. On social media and in private conversations, the words of testimony, comfort, counsel and encouragement have not ceased to pour out since the shocking death and burial of Nollywood personality, Alex Ekubo, who died from cancer. He battled the terminal disease for years, quietly and completely off the radar. He and his immediate family simply withdrew from view, interactions and contact as he underwent treatment until he gave up the ghost.

Only his very well trusted friends knew the ordeal and trauma, he and his family were going through at the time.

Totally, they respected his wish for quietude as life slowly ebbed out of him. And when he eventually took his last breath, his family and very close friends rallied to give him an honourable farewell.

The Bible, in the New International Version (NIV) says this in Proverbs 18:24, “One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

But the New King James Version puts it this way: “A man who has friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

Contextually, the wise King Solomon and  author of Proverbs points out that not all “friends” are loyal, but God can give you the kind of friend whose loyalty even outlasts family ties. Before and after he died the close friends of Alex Ekubo showed themselves to be true and dependable.

This was evident in all the preparations and activities that preceded the burial, right from the night of tributes to the interment in his hometown, Arochukwu, Abia State. Of the friends of Alex Ekubo that coordinated the funeral arrangements, two stood out: Ikechukwu Ogbonna aka Ik Ogbonna and Francis Nwogwugwu Udochukwu aka Vintage.

Truly, he was blessed with good friends in the entertainment industry and also had a wonderful family. He had relatives, classmates and neighbours, but Ik Ogbonna and Francis gave him the shoulder he needed in life and death.

As if he had an early premonition of his death, he reportedly made a seemingly prophetic comment in one of his happy moments while alive. He publicly told Vintage: “If my money is finished, I know you will stand in the gap.” This was deep and strong. Some blood brothers cannot even share such philosophical comments.

True to his prediction, they were there for him. Alex never wanted a public drama. From when his health failed, Ik Ogbonna and Vintage made sure his wish was respected and honoured, even in death. Both were friends indeed.

When he died, the friends of Alex carefully protected the funeral plans until he made the final journey to his resting place. 

They mourned, respected and honoured their friend. Netizens set the internet on fire as they showered them with praises.

In his tribute, legendary Pete Edochie, who  considered Alex as his Nollywood son, said: “Alex has always honoured me whenever we met. Even though I only encountered him a few times, he left a lasting impression. I want to especially thank Ik Ogbonna, who proved himself a friend in life and death. Ik, may it be well with you.”

Another Netizen wrote, “The friends you keep today are what your children will see as connections tomorrow. In this life, money can gather crowds, fame can attract attention, but only love and loyalty can keep people standing beside you when storms arrive. What Ik Ogbonna and Vintage have shown the world is not ordinary friendship. This is the kind of friendship our fathers spoke about under moonlight. The kind of brotherhood where a man covers his friend’s shame, protects his dignity, and carries his burden without announcing it to the world. When a tree is healthy, many birds gather around it. But when the storm breaks the branches, only a few remain. Many people celebrate with you in laughter, but only real brothers stay through silence, pain, sickness and tears. Ik Ogbonna and Vintage proved themselves not with words, but with presence. Presence is the highest form of love.”

Another wrote: “They stood by Alex when cameras were absent. They stood by him when social media was quiet. They stood by him where there was nothing to gain. That is not friendship built on convenience, that is covenant. In this generation where many record everything for attention, these men protected the privacy of their brother. They understood an old wisdom that says a loyal friend guards your secret like a mother guards her child. They never traded his private life for public sympathy. They honoured him in life and even in death. That alone speaks louder than a thousand speeches. The elders say when a man walks with good people, even heaven recognizes his footsteps. The love these men showed Sir Alex Ekubo will never be forgotten before God and men. Loyalty is a seed and every seed planted in sincerity must surely bear fruit.”

Now, to my dear brothers and sisters who want to be honoured in life and death like Ekubo was, do you share the bond these three shared? What type of friend are you? Are you a friend that acts like the dog which cracks the bone on his neck? Are you trusted among your circle of friends? Are you the jealous type, but you are craving the honour given to Ekubo, even in death?

These questions are pertinent because he who must go to equity must go with clean hands. This is a typical example of the time-honored statement: what you sow is what you reap. Ekubo reaped what he sowed in the life of his brothers Ik Ogbonna and Vintage. Not once or twice did he fail to describe them as blood brothers. Both could have betrayed him when his health was low, but they did not. They could have brought in a blogger to make money for them, yet they stood in pure brotherhood.

It is for the singular reason of shielding him away from the cameras and public eyes which he never wanted as his health failed him that people are blessing Ik Ogbonna and Vintage. 

Again, I read another post by an anonymous fellow dedicated to Ik Ogbonna and Vintage.

The netizen said: “May the God who sees what happens in secret reward Ik Ogbonna and Vintage openly. May doors open for them in places where keys cannot reach. May they never lack people who will stand for them the same way they stood for their friend. When trouble comes, let helpers rise from the east, west, north and south. May they never sorrow in silence. May their homes know peace? May their children inherit favour. May the tears they shed for their brother become oil of joy tomorrow for them.”

Are these for content? No. All these prayers are for good acts done for a fellow human. I ask why do people choose to be extremely jealous? I recall the story of University of Abuja students who watched their classmate die in a swimming pool because most girls in the class talked to him. They even stole his phone and money and watched him die. Do such friends deserve this true bond, honour and respect at their last minute? There is a big lesson to be learnt from the brotherhood of the trio.

Interestingly, now that most people are seeing the good works of his friends, who knows how he also covered their nakedness? Was he a friend that shaved his friend’s hair at their back? Was Alex a selfish friend? Was he a braggart among his friends? Was Alex a type of friend who betrays their friends in exchange of cash, fame and status?

Almost three months ago, the internet was abuzz because “Thomas” (not his real name), left home on April 22, to visit his former secondary schoolmate (codename Noel) in a private estate in Ajah.

Once Thomas got there, his beloved secondary school friends, 23-year old Noel strangled him to death with the help of his accomplice, 21-year old Nath (not his real name). Wherever Noel and Nath are today, they must have seen the burial of Ekubo and what his friends did. They must surely know that a small portion of hell will be waiting for them – except they genuinely repent, confess, turn a new leaf and live righteously till their earthly life ends.

Just as Noel and Nath need to repent, men and women generally, even the young need to repent from past ungodly deeds. These include those friends who do not keep to and respect business proposals and the friend who kills a fellow friend to take over his wife. Where are the jealous friends who plot evil about their friends? What about friends who betray friendship to get the upper hand in businesses and the corporate world? Friends who disclose private information for their friend to be apprehended? Where are those friends who poison friends because he is doing better? A friend who lures his friend’s wife and female children to bed just to destabilize his family? Where are political friends who kill each other to gain the whole world? Where are the young generations of ritual killers? Where are the friends who can boldly stab their friends with a knife without a care in the world, like what happened in Delta State, where a young person allegedly stabbed his junior brother because of bathroom slippers.   

Women are equally guilty of this. IK and Vintage have proved that a little shift in the mindset can create a forever peace. Both saw Alex Ekubo being celebrated for life, light and love with the sharing of beautiful memories. The words are still flowing.

Alex. Forever loved, forever missed and forever remembered.