It is possible to reactivate any love mode between men and women no matter how bad. It is even greater and better to reboot your own love mode and be in perfect control of it. One might wonder how a man or woman can be in control of her man. Through communication, positivity, good conduct and wisdom, all these are possible. Though one might not be 100 percent in control of another person’s life, relationships can be rebuilt. I stumbled across a very touching message online which was writ- ten by a celebrated female artiste whose marriage broke down. In her writeup she regretted leaving her marriage. She said: “Ladies, please try and resolve your differences with your husbands. Separation and divorce are not the best options except if there

is domestic violence, then you should run for your dear life. Most of us who are separated wear the shoe and know where it is pinching. Forget all the social media rabble-rousers praising the woman for leaving her marriage, addressing them as king, queen, strong woman, this and that.” While admonishing ladies to resolve marital challenges, she asked: when most of you ladies take a walk from your marriage, do you sit back to watch the world do merry-go-round? No, you also wake up, make yourself available and keep up with the joneses. In that process, another man might be interested in you and a relationship might spark up immediately.

Now, when you take a walk from your marriage, the next man you will meet and date is a married man. Have you bothered to know what his wife had endured to still be there as a wife? Do you know the number of sleepless nights, hours of praying and crying she passed through to ensure she and her husband remained together as a couple? Do you know what she has been through in the hands of her in-laws just to remain in marriage? Do you know that those issues you could not take in your marriage, she swallowed severally, just to be in marriage? Do you know how many times she activated her love mode? Who told you her own love was not fading at a time? But she became smart and chose to reactivate it. Sister, know today that not all that glitters is gold. When you see women who have endured for 10-30 years in marriage, always salute them. Then, when you take a walk, try to stay in your lane and be mindful of yourself. As we say in Nigerian parlance, “do not pour sand into another woman’s garri” by ghting with her over her husband. Do not create distraction.

It is unfortunate that most of the separated and divorced beautiful babes will always date married men because the single boys will never marry them. Handsome hunks with six packs will only get entangled with a divorcee for sel sh reasons and take off when he is through. Again, in Africa, many families differ when their son brings home a divorcee for marriage. That is the major reason men and women should settle their differences as spouses and then move on.

A sister, Marilyn, who is also a lawyer, poured out her heart privately to her friend who used her story as one of her pieces of advice for the monthly women meeting. Marilyn’s friend, Mercy, used her friend’s situation to admonish women. “I have a friend who regrets leaving her marriage. Though she alleged domestic violence then. Her family helped her immediately to divorce her marriage. The attitude was, “Rubbish! How
can you abuse a learned female counsel of the Federal Republic of Nigeria.” Marilyn moved
out of her matrimonial home with her eight months old baby girl. More than 15 years later, Marilyn said: “I wish I was mature enough to take a personal decision; I would not have left my marriage. In fact, I would have worked to make things

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happen. I would have lived in that abusive relationship, while I raised more children and built my own family to behold. Today, when I travel to my people, my daughter and I are con ned to my late mother’s old house while my brothers live in their man- sions with their families. During festive periods, they would be very busy with their own families while my daughter and I watch them like cinema. My heart breaks more because none has time for my daughter and I. Before good morning would fall out of their mouths, they would hop into their cars and zoom off. I regret walking away from my marriage.

A beautiful Nollywood actress who just got married in a lavish, lovely wedding is being dragged all over the social media for marrying an alleged serial cheat. In another post, netizens had also said the beautiful bride is now in regret for not doing her homework well.

“Some allegedly quoted her as saying, “There are a lot of things I did not know about this man.” Again, others have even warned her not to come on social media and drag her husband saying that after all, she jumped into the marriage without proper homework. If the man had reconciled with his former wives, these issues would not have risen.

Common knowledge has proven that all the challenges in marital relationships could be resolved if only the partners are interested in changing their mindset. That men need their respect intact is not contestable while women go over the hills for their men’s love and care.

Now, for the willing souls who crave for happy moments in their lives again, they can start with a special pet name meant for just the two of them. It creates a bond and dampens anger. Sweet pet-names would endear the spouses to each other, bringing them closer. Such closeness will embolden them to look into each other’s eyes and have heart to heart conversation.

A man who is romantic, who wants the climax of the night