By Vera Wisdom-Basey
Non-governmental organisation, The Wife, has celebrated its 16 years of existence.
The event, which took place in Lagos, saw many couples in attendance. The programme was formerly titled Elders Forum, but it is now known as the Couples’ Night, where diverse issues affecting marriage are discussed.
During this year’s celebration, there were lectures by different speakers, couples’ dance and intercessory prayers for couples, among others.
The first lecture, titled “Marriages in our contemporary world,” was delivered by Lyndy Ajoh. She described marriage as a thing that has a foundation: “Every marriage is like a foundation that you continue to build on. If it is on lies, deceit or hatred, it will lead to war because it is the type of seed that you sow in your home that will either yield good or bad fruit.”
She listed some of the factors that lead to a successful marriage as love, paying attention to each other, stress management, sex and avoidance of a third party in the home, among others.
“Do not hide anything from your partner. Love bears no grudges. It also helps you to see your partner as your team-mate. You won’t abuse whom you love,” she said.
The second speaker, Dr. Dike Getrude, spoke on some of the health challenges associated with a troubled marriage, saying it could affect the social, mental and physical well-being of partners. She also warned that stress could lead to depression, anxiety and irritability.
She lamented that a family becomes dysfunctional the moment quarrels set in and when any of the partners begins to keep secrets. She counselled couples to beware of anything toxic that could pollute their marriage.
Apostle Emeka Matthew, who has been married since 1999, said he was still learning in his home. He called on couples to tolerate each other and warned that the day they stop tolerance, the marriage would begin to head for doom.
On divorce, he said: “Your wife’s character is not the reason for you to divorce her. Make God your foundational plan and both of you can execute it. Learn to appreciate your partner. If your marriage fails, it should be blamed on both of you.”
On her part, Mrs. Nkem Okoro, founder of The Wife, remarked that three persons had led the foundation after her, making the present president, Rev. Ade Emeka, the fourth. She described The Wife as generational impact of God through women.
“Today, the use of technology keeps increasing and I am still trying to be computer-compliant. So, how can I lead them when I am deficient in that area? But when God called me into the ministry, the anointing He gave me, any woman coming in to take over leadership will have much more. The Wife is here to touch one generation to another,” she said.
Also, Rev. Emeka said it was a pleasant experience to be part of The Wife.
She said: “The Wife assisted me to build my home and do what is expected of me in my marriage. Others should practise what they are being taught at the foundation. A lot of training is ongoing for the women. And the training for singles is also on course so that, before they get married, the teaching will guide them to make the right decision that will continue in their homes.”
While advising women to stick to their marriages and train their children well, she also urged youths to listen to their parents’ counsel for a better society.