Dear readers,
As the year has started to run, I want urge you to improve your relationship with your spouse so that you can begin to enjoy a blissful marriage union as intended by our God.
You might have been bitter for a long time or felt trapped in your relationship. You could be feeling that there is no hope. But, if you will hear me out, this may begin the turnaround for you.
Women do not want plenty from their spouses. When you, the men, find a virtuous woman as the good book describes in Proverbs 31:10-31, you want to keep her happy. Most virtuous women want to keep on having these qualities. To help them, there are seven things they want from you. Remember that you are the head of the household and that you have a role to provide for the family. The husband must be provider and protector of his wife. He should be ready to defend his family. And should realize that he is the pastor of the home.
Eight signs that your relationship is emotionally healthy:
1
. Spiritual leader: As the head of household, your wife sees you as the spiritual leader in the home. This means that she wants to follow behind you as it concerns creating a godly home. She expects you to encourage the entire household to pray and fellowship together. You should be coordinating church activities in the home for her and the children to follow. Remember that you are the head of the family.
2
. Appreciation: She needs to know that she is meeting the basic needs of your life. A few encouraging words daily from you to let her know that you appreciate all she does for you and the family will go a long way in keeping her happy.
3
. Affection: Your wife constantly wants your validation that you love her. She needs to know that you cherish her always. It won’t cost you anything to spontaneously hold her hand in the grocery store.
4
. Pillow talk: Set out time to talk intimately with her. Ask her how her day was while massaging her feet. Your wife needs to know that you have a special time for her.
5
. Protection: As a husband, your job is to protect your family. Your wife needs to have confidence in your ability to protect her and the entire family. This means that she can go to sleep at night knowing that you have locked up and that everyone is safe. Remember that the home is your castle and that you are the king. Let her know that the goal of your life is to protect her.
6
. Be attentive to her: Your wife hates to be ignored. Show her that you are paying attention when she is speaking to you. When you go out to a function, let your eyes say how much you love her. She will value you for it because you are expressing that she is at the centre of your universe.
7
. Invest in her: Make investments in her name to show that you trust her. Allow her to make choices that concern the home. Allow her to pursue her dreams. Does she want to go back to school and get her doctorate degree? Encourage her to do so. Is she being considered for that promotion at work? Let her know that you will work around her new schedule. In other words, to invest in her is to expand her world and you as the husband is the only one who can do it for her.
If you are not providing these things, you will be shooting yourself in the foot. Your wife can be extremely loving if she feels that she is receiving all these things from you. Believe me, she will go to the moon and back for you. Why not make 2019 the year that you changed to become a loving, confident provider, protector and spiritual leader of your household? I assure you that you will enjoy your marriage.
ν Dr. NJ