By Onyedikachi Anyaonyeabor
Book Title: Helping Her Win
No. of pages: 160
Publisher: Perfect Image Publishers
Author: Chiamaka Juliet Ugoo
Place of Publication: Nkpor, Anambra State
Year of Publication: 2021
ISBN: 978 978 58377 4 2
Chiamaka Ugoo’s Helping Her Win has its milieu based strongly on her personal experiences and many years of experience in the field of counseling young women to be winners. It is a crucially important guide or rather pathways, a girl-child who seeks motivation can be motivated to become the woman she sets out to be.
The book is a calculated attempt to inspire, motivate and educate that girl-child who has no job or a standard upbringing, yet set herself on fire just to help her financially struggling families out of poverty.
It is a compendium of hope to that young woman out there whose marriage or self esteem is at the brink of collapse, an eye-opener to that woman who feels her partner is not giving her the fairy tale marriage she hopes for and so sees divorce as the gateway to a sorrow free and perfect one.
It further serves as a solution guide to that working-class, jobless, skilled and unskilled woman in an abusive relationship who wish to escape from the violence meted on her by her partner, and a moral code to that man in a relationship who wouldn’t let go of past hurts until the worst happens, and who sees women as sex toys rather than the most priceless gifts to humanity.
The title of the book lends insight into its content as hope for women, both young and old in a world where it seems all hopes are lost, and its cover design depicts the author as a woman of high taste and quality.
The author’s experiences were an excellent motivation for exploring the topic. She carefully chronicled the inspiring lessons she learnt from her aggregative experiences as a mother and counselor, hence the subtitle ‘Inspiring Lessons and Experiences of a Mother Passionate about Mentoring Young Women to Win’.
Chiamaka viewed every challenge, issue, and context with the chorographical eyes of an experienced and concerned mother. She summed up the main thrust of the book thus:
“I am on a mission to inspire, motivate and educate as many young women as I can. I want them to know they can achieve great things if they are focused, and that there is no limit to what they can achieve. I want them to believe in themselves and know that they are worth more than they would ever imagine and that all that glitters is not gold. I’ll feel so fulfilled and accomplished if only one girl-child will be inspired and motivated by this book, if this book can lead just one young woman in the right path of life, then I’ve accomplished my mission (x)”
Engaging, concise and clear, Helping Her Win gives young women the clues to identify the hurdles to self-confidence, promotes women’s sense of self-worth, and explores the power that comes from preparation and outlines the steps to a fulfilling happy life.
This book is a brain child of inspiring lessons, which sprouted from the mistakes the author made as a young girl growing up in a society where mothers shy away from having heart-to-heart conversations with their young girls, let alone educating them on life issues and mistakes to avoid.
The simplicity of the author’s diction, her emotion-packed personal experiences and the descriptive analysis make the book easily understandable and engaging. In the thirteen publications herein contained, Chiamaka Juliet Ugoo took sweeps at issues the girl-child are exposed to in our society today, especially the catalogue of disasters they face without knowing a way to come out of them. She rigorously picked on and depicted strong love and care about people, especially the girl-child and her eagerness to give them better lives and opportunities.
She discussed issues large and small and duly reflected on their preconceived ideas. Her themes which have implications far beyond the girl-child are skillfully handled.
The topics, ‘Build Yourself First’ and ‘Early Sex Education is Key’ discussed in chapters two and three may have been told but never in such an unapologetic, yet respective manner or with such freshness, intensity and power as they are portrayed.
On ‘Build Yourself First’ , the author writes: “The family you give up your happiness and peace for today will treat you in an unbelievable way when things are not too rosy for you tomorrow. Work on yourself first, build yourself solidly first. Most times, because of your burning desires to help your family, you end up with so many regrets and mistakes later on in life. Be a better woman for you first. It’s not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself and to make your happiness a priority first. It’s very necessary” (21)
Helping Her Win with its richly developed insight into the ethos of womanhood, seeks to let young women know they are loved, they have the power to achieve anything they set their minds to, they should always refuse to live in fear, avoid living by comparison and the ability to believe. They are born winners.
In chapter twelve of the book entitled, “Special Appeal to Men”, the author chronicled and decried the various ways men abuse women and pleaded with them to always treat every woman with respect, honour and dignity.
Chiamaka Juliet Ugoo is a gifted writer, who knows the power of words and their ability to shape a child’s working knowledge of the world around her, a mother, partner, counselor, young women advocate and media personality. She is an inspiration, and has through life’s experiences, transformed into a beautiful woman, focused and talented.
She highlighted other nagging issues affecting the girl-child under the topics ‘Beauty Is Not Everything, ‘Having A Child Outside Wedlock’, ‘There Is No Perfect Relationship’. She also dwelt on Enduring an Abusive Relationship, Develop Self Confidence, Living With Social Influence, Never Settle for Less, among others.
One could imagine how challenging it would be to tackle problems the girl child are exposed to in our society, but Chiamaka Juiliet Ugoo did it with a finesse of detailed information which only a talented author like herself, with experience could possibly do.
It is said that ‘if you want to be remembered after you are gone, write things worth reading or do things worth writing about’. Chiamaka Juliet Ugoo has gifted the world with a book worth reading and has also done something worth writing about. She has in the words of Marie Corelli, “secured for herself a place among the truly great of the world”.
I have always known her since our days in National Broadcast Academy (NBA), Lagos, as a herald of positive change and a woman who believes that women are the most productive, delicate, compassionate and priceless gifts from God.
Chiamaka Juilet Ugoo has always craved to lead young women in the right path of life and has always longed for the intellectual distinction which as Marie Correli also puts it ‘ makes the writer a terror and power in the land,’ these she has achieved through this book.
Though a good work, some of the early chapters of the work was plagued with some editing errors and typographical incongruity, the credibility of the content does not suffer due to these errors which will likely be corrected in the next edition.
Helping Her Win is a timely masterpiece. It came at a time when manners are teetering on the edge of extinction and early sex and divorce are on the rise.
I have no doubt that this book will be priceless to as many young girls who seek mentorship. A thrilling, beautiful, and meaningful life awaits every woman who reads, understands, and follows the messages of the book. I therefore recommend it to all women, young and old for it is a fantastic read.