Why do some ladies resort to curses when guys break up with them? Why do some ladies have this natural impulse in some ladies to curse a guy they were dating once he says he’s no longer interested and suggests they both go their separate ways?
When you hear some ladies heap curses on guys they once claimed to love and had good times with, you begin to wonder what happened. Some of these ladies don’t even pause to think about their actions.
I witnessed a heartbreaking scene recently. I was left speechless at what I witnessed. This lady was holding her breasts and cursing a guy who stood nearby almost in tears and she was doing this at the top of her voice.
Some of the things she said were:
May no child of yours suck the breasts of any woman in this life!
May there never be the cry of a baby in your house!
May you suffer heartbreaks like the one I’m suffering now till you die!
It will never be well with you!
For the many times I have done abortions for you, may any woman you marry continue to lose her unborn children!
Those were heavy curses. I had goose bumps hearing her reel out curse after curse. She was crying too. She kept repeating these curses while wiping her eyes.
People were begging her to stop. Her ex was begging her to stop but she continued. She warned the guy not to come close to her, otherwise she would stab him. She had a scissors with her which she displayed and the guy retreated.
I felt bad for the guy and the woman he’s going to marry. It is sad that the lady was not only cursing the person who hurt her terribly but she was also cursing an innocent woman who will later come into the picture.
I felt bad for her. It was obvious that she was talking from a place of pain and that’s understandable but heaping curses on the guy and the innocent woman who would later marry him is not right.
It was sad watching her say those things in public but I knew something must have warranted her painful outbursts. I have heard some women lay curses on men who hurt them and things started going bad for these men.
Why do some ladies do this? Does it make the pain of breakup lighter? Does it help one deal it? Does it help these ladies feel better? Why do some ladies resort to curses when guys break up with them?
Some ladies claim that they do this because these guys toiled with their hearts and feelings. Some say that these guys deserve the curses for treating them badly and not taking their emotions into consideration.
One young lady told me a story of how she fell in love with a guy and they dated for eight years. During those eight years, she had two abortions, invested the money her elder brother gave her to start a business into this guy’s business and at the end of the day, he broke up with her and married someone he met in months.
I felt bad for her. What happened to her was bad but it was her fault too. While it is good for women to love men wholeheartedly, it is also important that they take their brains along. You don’t put your life on hold because of a man.
If you are dating a man and you want to get married as soon as possible and the guy is not making efforts to make your relationship official, break up with him and move on with your life. Your umbilical cord is not tied to his.
I am tired of listening to sob stories from ladies who have refused to use their brains and set standards in their relationships. You don’t allow a man take you for a ride with your permission and still come and cry wolf later.
Why should you allow a man use your body as a football pitch for years without thinking about tomorrow? Why should you continue enanger8ing your life by going for abortions while the guy blatantly refuses to use condoms during sex?
Young ladies should stop going back to men who hurt and take them for granted and expect magic to happen afterwards. You don’t force yourself on a man and expect your tomorrow to be peaceful and better.
It is better for ladies to move on with their lives, get engaged with profitable things rather than holding on to men and when these men dump them, they resort to curses. That’s not wise.
It is important for ladies to stop repeating old scenarios, hoping that something will change. They should stop hoping that guys who don’t treat them right will realize their worth and treat them better.
Ladies need to stop making excuses for guys who don’t want them anymore. They don’t have to curse these guys or be dramatic about it. You don’t necessarily have to be enemies with your ex to start with. There is nothing that can make up for the time lost but be brave about it and move on with your life.
I know it’s breaking your heart that no matter how much you love him and no matter how many times you tried to make things work, it was never enough. But don’t beat yourself up. It’s not your fault.
There was nothing you could have done better or said differently to change the final result; you simply fell for the wrong person. It’s time you open your eyes and see that. You deserve a better life than this. You deserve the happiness he never knew how to give you. You deserve to be loved by somebody who knows how to love.
If that guy you are dating is hurting you, open your eyes and see what your life could be without him. You could be free of this emotional roller coaster that’s getting you worked up all the time.
You can finally find that inner peace that he has deprived you of. That heartache and heartbreak you are suffering now is not your life’s love story. It’s just one bad chapter you had to experience so you can grow stronger from it.
You can be hurt. You can break. You can feel lost. You don’t have to heap curses on the guy who hurt you so bad. Don’t get carried away by that negative feeling. You have to learn from the experience so that you won’t repeat the same mistake again.
You should know that he was not the one for you. He was just someone who had to teach you what love should never look like, what you should never settle for. He showed why you should never settle for fragments of love and a life without joy.
Young lady, let that man loving you half heartedly and draining you go and take care of yourself. Love yourself with every atom of your being. Be a woman who has the courage to stand on her own and build her own happiness.
Don’t resort to curses; that is not cool. Let karma deal with the guy who has toyed with your love, heart and feelings. Just heal your heart and be a better woman.
Re: The importance of giving your partner some space
I really appreciate your write ups. They are wonderful and enlightening. Whenever I read from you, I relate with your words. Many people may not understand you but you are real. Keep it up and don’t mind that guy who always says nasty things about you.
-Keteren Gwari
Kate, I just appreciate you. Whenever I read you, it appears as if I am the one writing. Everything you wrote last week is on point. I deliberately give my wife space not because of love, but just for her not to be scuffled.
My wife is very stubborn and used to be very temperamental. I went ahead to marry her because I love her. I knew I could cope because of my exposure and understanding.
And today, I have been able to prim her to our mutual tastes. I like your piece last week, it is gender balanced. I like your guts because I am a feminist but not a core one like you. Keep up your well researched articles.
-Emeka Onyeokoro
Giving your partner some space is a good idea, however, its extent must depend on the level of mutual trust between the partners involved. If you give free space to some randy husbands and wives for instance, the results will be highly regrettable. Cheating and all its known social and biological consequences will become inevitable.
-Chioma Papa
You have a way of dealing with little but salient issues that have the capacity to destroy relationships. Well done, Kate. I agree that couples need to give one another some space but it shouldn’t be all the time to avoid temptation. You know men are tempted by what they see and wives need to keep close tabs on their husbands to prevent them from falling into temptation.
-Isaac Iloduba, Lagos
Kate, the agent of darkness sent to destroy relationships. You want men to give their wives some space so that they will start sleeping with different men and your evil agenda will be fulfilled. If you don’t know what else to write about, go away.
-Obinna, Aba