There is a great difference between a believer and an unbeliever. An unbeliever behaves the way he wants in the way and manner that please him most. The child of God behaves differently. He knows that God, his Father, is interested deeply in everything that concerns him. This will include the choice of a career, future spouse, et cetera.
The unbeliever may not be bothered fully about the person he or she is marrying. Some view it as a game of chance. If he is fortunate, in his language, ‘lucky’, he will get a good spouse but if his spouse does not meet his expectations, there is somebody, somewhere, to replace her. He has no guarantee that the new spouse will also meet his perceived expectations. If she does not, the union is weakened or once again broken and as would be expected, someone, somewhere, is ready to fill up the gap. The newcomer may not even care to consider his marriage history until the tie is either broken or there is estrangement between them. In each of the marriages, children may be born. This is why in a family you can see five children of the same father but of different mothers or five children of the same mother but of different fathers!
This situation would have been avoided if God has been brought into the marriage. He reveals our life partners if allowed to do so. “If you ask anything in My name,” the Lord Jesus told His disciples, “I will do it”. Nothing is exempted in the package. If we want Him to reveal to us our life partners, He will do so, provided that we have a personal relationship with Him. The problem with some believers is that, while making the prayer, their minds are already made up on who to marry. Their prayer is for God to rubberstamp their choice. He keeps quiet and they accuse Him then, of not answering prayers. If we are sincere in our prayers, by leaving everything in His hand, He will answer. We must appreciate the fact that seeking His guidance is not doing Him any favour. It is absolutely for our own good.
After God has revealed the life partner to someone, communicating it to the partner-to-be is a lot easier with men than with ladies. The man will approach the sister and then make his proposal. The sister will usually ask him how he knows that she is God’s choice for him. He will share the testimony with her. In my case, it was through the dream when I was doing Vacation job at Aba in 1973. That was a year before my graduation. It was a tall journey for me since I had wanted to sleep with the lady before I was born-again. I kept the revelation to myself for 15 months. It was uppermost in my mind to marry by the will of God, Who knows my future. I knew therefore, that I needed Him.
Sister Ify, after I gave my proposal, spent 18 months before acceptance as if she was paying me back with my coin for delaying also for 15 months.
In the case of sisters, it is not as easy as it is with men. They try to avoid being misunderstood. A few ladies have gone to brothers and laid the card on the table. The men could not accept that. One of the men went to the extreme of warning the lady never to enter his office again.
In another case, the sister kept the revelation to herself for two long years, praying over it. One day, she went to a house occupied by God’s children, discussing with each family. She mustered courage to knock at the door of the brother God had revealed to her that would marry her. When he opened the door, he was surprised to see her. There and then, God told him that she was his wife and that he should propose to her. “If I propose to her now,” he told God, “and she says that she will pray about it, the matter will be closed for ever”. That was his true nature, a nice and dedicated brother, but one who would hardly smile. After exchanging pleasantries, he made his proposal and was surprised when, as if the lady was aware of his deal with God, she accepted on the spot. It was when they attended my couples’ retreat that the sister shared this testimony with us, while our brother was laughing. They are happy in their marriage and now, they live in England.
There are some sisters and brothers we may be praying for today so that God will show them their future life partners. Some of them may not confess the whole truth to us, so that we will know how to present their case to God. The only thing we can do in their situation may be to plead with God for mercy. These may be people God had revealed to them their life partners many years ago but, who refused to accept His choice for them. These carnal considerations hinge on the person’s education, physical built, economic consideration, position the person holds in office or business, et cetera.
For further comment, Please contact: Osondu Anyalechi: 0802 3002-471; [email protected].