Last Saturday, about 9am, something evil happened that I am now grateful for. It was something about my mobile office, call it my mobile life. Losing a mere phone has taught or reminded me of lessons nobody should ever forget. As we say in christendom, read and be blessed.
First though, let me tell you something you have missed -no thanks to the missing gadget. The plan for this space today was to put out a tiny chunk of the humongous feedback vis-a-vis our double-barrelled serving last week (the gender of fatherhood and understanding unpicked telephone calls). It seems there’s not one reader of both takes who didn’t send in a reaction. It could have taken until year end or beyond to publish everything I got.
I kept wondering how I would manage that. Still, the rain of feedback kept falling. Then, something intervened, and I went without a phone for all of 10 hours. You won’t understand when I say that I am grateful for the system loss.
Suddenly, I had peace: I no longer had to worry not only about how long it would take to exhaustively publish the paragraphs of reaction but also about how those who may eventually be left out would react. Do you see how God can deliver you from yourself? For me, losing my electronic gadget is a beautiful, righteous escape route. Better to lose a handset than family, friends, fans, readers.
You get the point now? Apologies, Billionaire Prince White. But, seriously, anyone reading this who wishes to resend their reaction to last week entry is free to do so. I trust that I won’t have trouble accommodating the new deal, since there’s no way it would be as much.
From the foregoing, I hope you gleaned some lessons. Number one, in all things and at all times, be anxious for nothing. On that, there’s nothing to add, nothing to subtract; nothing to explain. Our number one lesson stands on its own and speaks for itself.
Number two, be careful how you lose sleep over nonsense because nature could nonsensify both the situation and you. In my own case, it was a mere telephone set. Yours could be something costlier, something deeper. Beware of useless worries.
The third and last lesson from what you already know is the consolatory realisation that the person who survives worry finds the very act of worrying silly and funny. When I lost the handset, and came face to face with the new impossibilities, I laughed in relief as well as in anger against my silliness all the while. Man should slow down. Man should take every day and everything one step at a time.
Talking about taking only one step per time, let’s make progress by checking out some of the other lessons embedded in my experience. Others may not count this as a blessing but being someone who calls his cup half full rather than half empty, a loss is a blessing; since it hints of a gain. I lost an old phone, I found a new one, a better brand. Praise the Lord, somebody!
That is the attitude we all need. Don’t kill yourself over anything, or anybody. As Chinua Achebe told the boy-child, if you don’t die young you will eat bearded meat. If you don’t allow worry to terminate your life, you will in due season replenish your stock so much that even your losses will beg to be noticed.
That is the word of the Lord. Many thanks, Mr Pius James and wife, Uty, out there in Southampton in the United Kingdom. While the reader worries about connecting the dots, I am running forward to point out other lessons. Next, beware of a smile.
Yes, you read that correctly. Better a frown than a smile. Okay, I take that back. However, never lose guard; never be carried away by a smile as it might bear a dagger buried in all that spellcasting plastic beauty.
I suspect strongly that the persons who helped themselves to my phone were the man and lady who appeared the most fond of me in that crowd. They took turns to fawn over me. This uncanny greeting immediately set off the alarm bells in my head. Alas, as happens almost always, I vehemently refused to listen to that small, still voice.
As we say in Nigeria, the thing is paining me now. Plus, I spent a little money on them; I settled their bill where we stood. Lord, I pray earnestly that it is not the couple who took my phone. And, in future, dear God, remind me to shine my eye well well no matter how friendly or loving that next person might appear.
And, you dear reader, stop laughing and concentrate so you are conscious enough to learn to imbibe these reminders. May you never fall prey to a smile, or to a laughter, or to any sweet useless something. May people with the worst intentions towards you never package themselves successfully as your bestie. I know that love is blind, but may you always manage to keep one eye open even during a kiss!
You can memorise and -as frequently as even impossible- repeat a personalised version of the last line to yourself. I know love is blind, but may I always manage to keep one eye open even during a kiss. If I had myself heeded that creed, my beautiful handset would still be here today. Only that, I would not be holding its more beautiful replacement and I won’t also be preaching this sermon on the mount of sweet regret.
That is the stark reality of life. We lose so we gain. We gain so we lose. And, the beat goes on.
Which brings us now to the best lesson of them all. For the decade of hours that I was disconnected from the world, I learned that without man man is nothing. I have heard people talk about how healthy and profitable alone moments could be. Yes, but ensure never to feel alone or lonely.
The human being was created to share and enjoy fellowship with others: we lose far too much otherwise. I cannot explain to you the joy I felt when reconnection happened. I feel better towards those who reached me immediately afterwards expressing how worried they were. I now understand why people with less or no social capital easily die or descend into depression.
Finally, no matter who and what you are, love and celebrate people because you shall need them, one day, one day. I know it is impossible to do all. But, try or do more than your best. You are dead alive without people who love or care about you.
God bless Nigeria!